No more AA

Driving!!




Gosh, I began my driving Lessons around a year ago... You know, It was exciting to book that first lesson, then to have it..... I booked mine with AA. Thought "hmmm Ford Focus? Decent car to practice in!" ...... so payed for 24 hours up front!



Took 20 hours of lessons on a manual car.. Passed my Theory with two mistakes...... and booked my Practical test, only to get a call to tell me my instructor has double booked and guess who has to cancel?........ME!!! Son of A GUN!!



So third year uni took over my life which meant the lessons had to stop... That shouldn't be a problem if I was told "Heba you drive like a MAN!!" and to me in the driving world is considered a compliment. I mean He couldn't be talking about anything else riiight?????



Now 8 Months have passed! I call Up AA because I wanna do my TEST ASAP!! Wanna have my own Currrrrrrr!! (car!) Buuuuuuuuuut...... I don't want my old instructor, I mean me and him were cool, maybe too cool for us to take each other seriously, I need to PASS not gossip!



Not sounding Shallow but I got the person from AA to read a list of all the MALE manual instructors in my area...... Ali...Malik ..Akbur.. Mohammed .. Denis....."stop there!!" Sounds like someone I can work with!


No disrespect to the others, but this is my money and at that stage I am entitled to Stereotype!! If they are Arab and/or Muslim (WHICH I AM!!!!!! thought I'd Clarify that) I have a slight feeling they'd rinse me for as many lessons as possible! Could be Very wrong but decided to stick to my stereotypes! Ignorant I am!!



Mr AA man agreed with me that my first lesson will take place in XXXXXX on XXXXX and how my instructor will call me before hand to confirm the times!!!! "yay! I might have my license b4 my 23rd!!"



So my phone ringss.. and its my instructor Denis! first reaction in my head is "woooooaaah is this a joke?"... again I must mention me being human I stereotyped him as BIG GAY Jamaican....... Must emphasis ..... I have no issues with anyone being gay ( as I have gay friends) or being Big (I'm one to speak) Nor Jamaican ( My other half and many of my friends are orig from same background!)



I mean I could be wrong.. but my explanation behind this stereotype is ...... the higher the voice the Bigger they are, For some reason I can tell what race a person is from just by their tone in voice, not Accent! .. Just TONE! I'm Talented!



Brace yourself to this......... So I turn up... Guess what?? He is a big Gay Jamaican ! Oooh I'm starting to think my stereo types are accurate!!



His first few sentences made me feel anxious, he was loud, in my face and clearly stated a few times that "no other instructor can do it like him! "


So he then begins to ask me a few questions like "what is this?" ( pointing at what I though up until then is a Rear view Mirror) So with all confidence thinking it was such a STRAIGHT FORWARD easy question I replied "rear view mirror!!!"......


Thats when he turned around and stuck his finger in my face and said "Nuh!.... This is like a woman's handbag.... we all have one...... but ONLY WEEEE get to see whats in it!..... Its called a Drivers Mirror hunni!" ..... How am I mena react to that? Wow! ok???? Was it really necessary?


Then he told me to get to know the steering wheel and the gear stick and I quote "touch it .. caress it.. get to them... feel every Bump! " ........... again WOaah! Was it NECESSARY? like I'm starting to think this dude is on crack!
So That alone made me feeel soooo uneasy and tense about driving and may I mention........ At night!!!! ....


One I starting driving I clearly was still getting the hang of it ......but Mr Handbag was refusing for me to relax..... told me I was killing the steering wheel...... REALLY? REALLY? Do u blame me????



Me being the joker I am , I made him laugh a few times, Oh did I regret it! Every time he Laughed he'd slap me across my arm and hysterically rock back and forth having a laughing fit and then suddenly stop , stare and me and erupt with another set of laughter! Nah .... Nah.. don't Touch me.... I don't know you like thatQ Really????



SO right now, for the first time EVER I looked at the time praying its almost home time.. coz right now I'm feeling homesick!!! WTF!! But No no nooooo I got another hour and a Half!
All this time and torture and its only been half an hour?????


Throughout the lesson he kept reminding how great he finds himself and everytime he asked me questions, he really didn't give me a chance to reply and he again stuck his finger in front of my face rotated his neck 180 degrees and told me "Nooo.. coz your previous instructor isn't me!"


Everytime I did well he'd click his fingers 5 times while staying "Wickiiiiid wickiiiiid"..... Dude I can't relax if everything is soo hyped and Over Crazy!! I need to Focus on driving not on where your finger is flying to!!!

SO end of lesson he asked me what i thought of him, but as it was soo surreal , I was thinking this is as good as a dream (but a nightmare) so I can say what I want coz once I leave the Car I will wake up!! SO I said he was good in parts, but he was too much for me, like he made me anxious!! (wow I'm brave!.. this could of turned ugly) ....... he instantly got defensive and ask if he was tooo enthusiast .......... I think replied with a hint of frustration ... "enthusiasm is GOOD...... Its just your Approach!!" ........ bottom Line.... I made an excuse to why i couldn't confirm future dates and that I'd contact him..... Felt like a first date gone sour and me saying "Don't call me.... I'll call you" only for the person to never call back....

so I contcted AA... I need me a new intructor and I give up on Manual...... This dude converted me ..... BIG TIME!

So right then I just wanted to pass my test.. and just be able to go from A to B ....... don't care about gears anymore!!! AUTOMATIC... (Yess I did insult most ppl who drive automatic..... Lazy Mofos... I am now one of you!!! )


So got new instructor ..... Byron....... Left me a voice message " Ello Eba this is Baroon your driving instructor from the Ah Ah".......... no stereotypes.. the accent speak itself.... All I could think of at that time is Little Ms Docelyen! LOL! But he sounded much cooler than my last instructor..



1st lesson, Very laid back dude... let me drive.. was very on point....... Me thinking..... Yeah this is gonna go smooooothly!!! Again..... I was wrong....... 2nd lesson, he made us park up in a petrol station while he spoke to family in Lagos.. REALLLY??? Am I being pranked ? I'm having a Lesson! Damnit people!!


Then when I began to drive He received another 3 more calls from Lagos.. where he had long conversations while I drove at 8pm almost crashing in a few cars..... Dude ..... Not Cool!



3rd Lesson....... couldn't tell you how that when..... waited 20 mins.... called him..... that when he went "Ohhh ello ebaaa.. Ow are you?? " .. Yeah I'm waiting and have been for 20 mins.. "ohh we had a lesson today???" ..... what the Rasss... YESSS we do! "ohh I am running behind schedule and I forgot to call you!" ......Dude..... not Cool!


Call up AA again........... I want my Money I'm done with this ! Next move............ CRASH COURSE!!! Anyone know a good company for intensive lessons? Need to get this Sorted!!